playing grown up

I have a life now.

Yes, a life. I’d forgotten what it was like.

My new job is wonderful. Right now we’re working summer hours, which means roughly 8:30-4, Monday through Friday (no working on the weekend!). We actually get vacation days and breaks (fall break, thanksgiving break, Christmas break) . I almost dissolved into tears of joy when I learned the break schedule. I have new toys to play with (aka, a laptop and design programs). And this afternoon I have been sitting in Stone Cup designing a book cover from old yearbook photos.

I have evenings again. Evenings mean bike rides, playing outside, pilates, and cooking dinner. Actually getting to the bank before it closes. You know, normal people activities.

Plus, I actually enjoy what I do. Lots of design, which is really fun. Really cool people.

I hung a whiteboard on my door and started a word of the day. Everyone has come to enjoy it; I get complaints if I don’t get a new word up by 9 a.m. each morning. Contests then ensue to see who can write the best sentence on the board. It gives people a reason to stop by my office. And maybe the routine will bump me up a few points on the GRE . . .

I can definitely say I haven’t been bored. It’s been some adjustment, as all new jobs are; and lots to learn.

God is good.

God was good before, too.

I often feel like a kid playing “grown up.” I go to my office, where I can initiate projects, call meetings, make suggestions. And people listen to me. They like what I have to say. And somewhere inside I think “but I’m just a kid. Don’t you know I’m just pretending to be a grown up?” I think the same thing when yet another friend gets married, has a baby, makes some life-altering, very adult-like career move.

It’s making more and more sense.